Goodbye 2008, Hello 2009

Omo, what a year. What to say? It wasn't what I expected to happen, but it was good. Got closer to friends, learned new things about close friends, got a girlfriend, maintained a long distance relationship, and learned.. in school. So far, it's been one of the best years of my existance. So much to be thankful for and so much more to do in the coming year.
Super glad to have GOOOOOD friends like Calyx, April, Carolyn, Loujel, Ryan and Johanna. We've drifted and came closer and so much has changed, but we're still the best of friends. Er, never thought that I'd turn bisexual though "/ That's one of the big changes I've been through this year. I don't mind though, I had someone(people) to lean on when it happen and after it happened. Crazy things can happen that you never expect to happen. That's one of the best things about life, to learn to deal with whatever God throws at you and you accept it, learn and move on, while applying what you learn along the way. I've become a little bit more opiniative, too(: I think that person that I became closer with is Ryan, my council buddy. We've got alot more things in common than I thought when I first met him. He's my best guy friend and I can trust him with almost anything cos I know he won't judge me. Ah, don't forget the girlfriend either. Geesh, she's a super wild rollercoaster ride. Love her though. She's got the determination of the most determined thing in the universe and loves me to the point of attachment. Well, not so much. But she's been there for me lots and lots this year, even if we broke up and get back together, fight and make up. Plus, props to Loujel, April and Carolyn for helping me through AP Chemistry and life in general. JOHANNA, miss this hobo, we've drifted but been through crazy things; jumping off walls, running the tracks, walking through haunted places.
Resolutions, got some for this year and hopefully can achieve them all:
1. No more fights with babe: I know things, bad things are gonna happen this year. And maybe, just maybe with tons of luck and love, we'll make it through it. No more yelling and swearing and lying. Oh, refer to some things below.
2. Pass AP Chemistry: That will be a miracle. And when I say pass, I mean get high marks on the AP exam, learn a couple things, get 'A's and be a good student. Got my friends by my side, hopefully they wont back out.
3. Save MONEY: Poor as hell. No more weed money. Still gotta pay for babe's phone, even with babe's help(: I wanna get, save and spend some cash on myself for working so hard.
4. Have a balanced lifestyle: I'm already having a hard time dealing with life. And AP isn't helping. So I'm gonna try really hard to balance everything.
5. Get fit: Let's lose some pounds. I'm sort of unhappy with my weight and figure but starving is bad. So I'll work out instead. People might say you don't need to work out, you're already skinny, but it's for my happiness and what I think about myself. And maybe I'll get my friends active(:
6. Be a good daughter: Be more responsible. Clean the house once in a while, don't stay in my room 24/7, eat dinner with the family. Maybe even wake up early on the weekends and have family breakfasts.
7. Limit my time on the laptop: I'm gonna go blind one day.
8. Maybe, just maybe go to California: I wanna go see my girlfriend. Oh, and some colleges I want to go to; UC Irvine, UC Los Angeles, U. Southern California, UC San Diego etc. and ROADTRIP(CA to WA or Canada) with the family(:

54 more minutes and something seconds until 2009,

Rollercoaster Ride

So today was a rollercoaster ride. A couple ups and a few downs. In the end, I'm pretty much content. But that's for now. But lately I'm analyzing everything in my life. My girlfriend, my family, my friends, my wants, needs, my future and my present. I guess it's one of the phases in my life that I have to conquer. Life's been throwing so many things at me lately. I'm pulling through though.

I want to have a healthy relationship with my girlfriend. Lately we've been fighting a lot, just like before. I hate it. It's hurting both of us. I don't want to lose her. I love her too much. But there are the times where I have my doubts about everything dealing with her. It scares me because what if..
<3

kanojo to nihongo dramas

so, if i do a science fair project, i get an automatic 'A' for chemistry(:
today was a good day. got to wear my *NEW shoes, and my girlfriend loves me.
right now im talking to my girlfriend, and we're talking about when we're going to have our first kiss. its hard having a long distance relationship especially when they we're your best friend before the relationship. there's not a lot of trust, a lot of problems and a bunch of insecurities. at times, i wonder if we're going to last. and sometimes i question my own feelings. but im sure that i love her(: im super determined to go see her next year.

oh, btw. im listening to this super sad song. it's only human by kei. its japanese. and you should watch one litre of tears. its about a girl who has this scary spinocerebello degeneration disease (?) and its a story about how she copes with it. its really sad and emotional but it's worth it to watch it. you'll fall in love with the characters and cry in every episode. i recommend it to everyone. i've told my close friends about it and they watched it and they feel the same way(: go watch it.

thankfulness(;

so today's my birthday and i'm really happy(: today was a really goooood day and im thankful for everything that's happened today. and i kind of forgot to do a thanksgiving blog, so this will be my thanksgiving/ birthday blog thing(:
so i'm thankful for my mommy and daddy who buys me what i want, when they can afford it. they're always there for me even when they don't know. and i know i don't listen to what you say all the time and i hide lots of things from you guys, but im very thankful that you guys made me ^___________^ thanks for providing food, a home, supplies, money, and LOVE everyday. you guys are truly the best parents in the world, to me and nicko.
thanks fattie, for always being the target of my teasing(;< kidding. love you little brother. thanks for keeping my secrets and helping me out from time to time. i really appreciate what you do for me even if i'm always mean to you. love you(:
i love my kanojo (girlfriend). she's always there for me when i need her. she provides me the love i seek for and the shoulder to sleep and cry on at times. she's a bossy, bipolar, retarded cow who loves me, and i love her. she means the world to me and i'd be lost without her love. plus, i'd be super empty. thanks for listening to my problems and dealing with my somewhat busy schedule. thanks for being the bestfriend and being there when i breakdown from stress. basically, thanks for loving me for who i am and who i'm becoming. you truly are my angel.
i love my bestfriends:
thanks johanna for supporting me in everything. you're there to listen to me cry, whine and laugh. thanks for making me laugh to the point where i have to cry and pee in my pants. we're drifted apart but you're still my best friend.
PS thanks for the 15 comments on myspace(:
carolyn, i love you. thanks for driving me to school, picking me up from triple bs and being there for me. i remember the talk we had that one day it was just us. we can relate to some things and i'm thankful that i have you to lean on. thanks for cooking me food everytime you come to my house and hopefully everything works out for you and bryan(:
april joy p.b. haha, thanks for making me laugh really hard. hm, you're there when i need you and i know i can rely on you for things. thanks for giving me constructed critisism when the time comes and thanks for teaching me things that i dont understand.
loujel, thanks for being my school buddy(: you're in all my periods this semester. but thanks for listening to my problematic problems. you're a good friend.
lord ryan(: thanks for everything. you're my guy best friend and i know you'll always be there for me. thanks for checking up on me to make sure that i'm okay. thanks for being the source of my laughter and food (sometimes).

**i'll always be here for you guys when you need me(:
and for the best friends, thanks for making my $weet $ixteen a really happy one. this will be a memory to remember.
<3charmaine