Pouts ;D

so i've been thinking again, and
daydreaming. mostly the thinking though. i guess
im contemplating the consequence of my actions,
what i want in life, people (how they affect me) and
right now. i guess in a way, im happier than i've been
in a while. and that's good right? i guess im coming
to terms with certain things but not everything,
-_____- anyways,
went college fair, was okay.
then pearls, ate and took pictures.
skipped third then went to fourth. crashed after my
test, lmao. had council after.
cruised at mcdonalds for about an hour. then came home
with Loujel.

RAWR, hopefully mommy wont take away Lapris<3
..yet.
tomorrow will be a GREAT day ^_____^
i just know it :D
<3 babez ;D

"baby, you dont know what you do to me"
watashi wa anata go daisuki desu,

Behold

your average short day. nothing more, nothing less.
went to gym during first,
zoned out during second.
eat lunch during lunch,
do essay during third,
and listen during fourth -_______-
nothing out of the ordinary.
planning to go genkis on Monday though.
hm, my contacts are irritating me.
bleh, i love you<3
played with my phone, and i dropped it T_T
now, there's this little chip on the side, hmp.
thought about some things today. and yesterday too!
and im not sure if they're good thoughts or bad thoughts.
haha, just thinking now, absolutely good thoughts.

recently, my tummy's been acting funny. maybe it's
my time of month but my ribs are sorta hurting too.
gaah, babez<3

"somewhere inside me, there's something changing.."

Calendar:
April 29: Celebration 2009
April 30: Council
May 1: Big Brothers, Big Sisters & test corrections & party :D
OH! and grandma's birthday!
May 2: SAT -___-
May 4: Genki Sushi?
May 8: Nicko's Birthday

Music: Dead and Gone by Travis Garland

STARBURSTS!

i like the red ones :D
and we have bigs in a couple of minutes.
today has been a REALLY good day,
got 30 minutes of extra sleep,
took a hot shower, and shaved.
spent quality time with April,
bought some food in the morning
and ended up being late to first period,
by 30 minutes.
i didnt care though ^___^
bbl.

Wednesday

was a good day,
but not as good as yesterday.
its was good even i didnt talk to you, HA!
i guess im proving to myself that i am capable of
doing things that i dont want to do.
honestly, i think im becoming stronger and stronger
everyday. and that's a good thing.
im still thinking about things that i shouldnt be
thinking about, but i guess its okay.

played a boring game during first.
took notes during second.
took notes and corrected work during third.
and did more work during fourth.
i feel kinda accomplished :D
walked around during lunch
and Carolyn brought me corn this morning.
bought food during fourth; m&ms and 3 musketeers

came home, did nothing besides aim and listen to
music, yannoe the usual. now im listening to Calyx.
getting bored -_____- haha.

tomorrow's council day and Ryan's coming back!
WOOHOO!
antelopes and lions and giraffes in AFRICA!

calendar:
April 23, 2009: Council/ Trash Pick-Up (2:30pm- 4:30pm)
April 24, 2009: Big Brothers, Big Sisters (2:30pm- 3:30pm)
April 25, 2009: Adopt-a-Block (8:00am- 12:30pm)
April 25-26, 2008: Invisible Children Rally

Friday

is Big Brothers Big Sisters day.
but today's was cancelled.
watch bloody videos during first,
and ate popcorn and m&ms :D
took notes during second
went to retrieve papers at lunch and wait for
April and Loujel to be done eating.
third was hilarious. Tomi talked about her experiences
with almost getting raped, hiking etc.
waited for food from Saber Grill.
was late to fourth cos i waited for my food and
i went to get some m&ms ^______^
did worksheets during fourth.
took bus home and almost died coming down the
stairs (April). talked to Ryan for a little while,
i miss that sucker.

tonight's April's party :D
gonna have some fun tonight!
edit this later.

Thursday

is council day (:
lol, talking to Kurtis on aim ^___^
he's my new buddy! lmao, he's a cool
person to talk to.
anyways, i miss Ryan. i texted him a couple times
today but i hope he's having fun up there.
uh, played a boring game during first. it was hot
and i didnt want to get sweaty.
PLUS, i didnt want to get my white jeans dirty
took notes during second. fell asleep for a while.
had NHS meeting at lunch, then went to the counselors.
did almost nothing during third. made copies with sabrina
(the TA) and made questions. got saber grill tomorrow!
lmao, and did worksheets during fourth.
council after school, but not alot of people came.
had trash pick up, went with Jam and Joh.
Joh left and me and Jam had a deep-ish convo.
talked about what we like in girls and what-not.
uh, got pizza. FATASS! rofl, and did nothing at council.
besides clean up and organize things.
and i have Karen's hat ^___^

uh, McDonalds with Jam, Jennifer and Dyllan.
took bus home, and ate dinner.
talked to Calyx blah blah blah all that good stuff
and now im on AIM(:

i should be doing homework, but me being the lazy person
that i am, will do them later. plus, i dont know what video
Ms. Thomas is even talking about. there's no damn video,
unless im blind, even when im wearing my glasses.
watashi wa me ga warui desu.
some japanese, lol.

rizi<3

Wednesday

is a short day(:
work on an essay during fourth
test and sleep during second
ate lunch with April, Carolyn, and Johanna.
watched a video during third -_____-
test and worksheet for Japanese.
came home and took a nice nap

but whatever, got council tomorrow
and bigs on friday, bleh.
ryan is leaving in less than half an hour
and he still never called me back,
loser.

grandma came home today, WOOHOO!
i miss my grammy lots.
and uncle and auntie are here too!
damn dog next door is irritating me
>______<
procrastinating again..its okay
i'll get work done later.
1797
lmao, sleeping in my brother's room
for the next two months of my life.
OH! party on friday, for April (:

craving some little caesers(sp?)

<3rizi

Tuesday

seem bearable with the people around me
gave rabies to April and Carolyn D;<
first period, learned about the atomic bomb.
was sad..lots of people were vaporized (chemistry!)
second wasnt as bad as i thought it would be.
answered questions and went over study guide
ate lunch with the gang minus Loujel plus Shayne
hm, talked to Calyx for a little while...bleh.
OH! not in a mean way or anything..just arguments
slept during third and fourth was..okay.

caught up with MINDO ^___^
deng, SA meeting was pretty long...
OMG! i oppose having our proms in the school gym,
that's...ew!
went Shiro's and McDonalds after with Jen and Mindo.
came home, ate dinner. yannoe, the usual.
cleaned room and talked on the phone for a while.
then i talked to Ryan, gonna miss that butthole(;

today wasnt as worse as it could be,
and i'd rather not argue.
but i'm still wishing that things would go back to how
they were before. maybe 2 weeks ago, would've been nice.
on the bright side: grandma's coming home tomorrow!
bad news: leaving early for the Philippines; June 15, 2009 - July 3
good news: leaving the same day as Ryan so we may see each other :D

bleh, still wishing.
& i love you (giggles)

Mondays

is not the best day of the week.
but today was a pretty good day.
still have to catch up on sleep and all but,
the people i talked to today, made me happy.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY APRIL! (:
guess what? my best friend just turned seventeen, lol
hm, i havent been this happy for a while, but..
hopefully nothing can ruin it, lmao.

its funny because there's this one person who can make me smile.
can you guess who?

& aww, this guy asked me to senior prom..sorta.
he was kinda shy. lol, but idk...
im sorry patrick -_____- we'll have to see
but i wouldnt mind going.. its just that i'd feel out of place.

AND ryan's leaving soon *tear, lol. and not that reminds me of something..
which also reminds me that ryan drove to genkis today,
AND someone said that im gonna drive like a NASCAR racer! WOOHOO!
OH! i also saw the police! they came to...lmao.

and i saw bart..odd.

OH! i think i've made a decision..i think.
i can feel my heart beating a little too fast

edit 8:24 PM
today's not a good day

all in honesty

its obvious i dont make you happy.

so now its my call,
but am i gonna follow through?
you don't know me, i dont even know myself

wishes

i wish i could make you happy.
i seem to always make you angry.